Fantasy Woman Monday

Yes, Yes. I know that today’s title is a deviation from my typical Fantasy Man Monday. However, in the interest of diversity of all kinds I am shifting gears on this Martin Luther King Birthday. All puns intended and intact.

Face it girls. Women are beautiful. We admire other women. You know it is true. We look and we have our own ideas of what is sexy. Admit it. We do look and at times we may model ourselves after beautiful women so that we will feel more sexy and appealing. At the very least we may wish to look more beautiful like XYZ, model, actress, someone we know. The fashion industry is built on the concept.

As a romance writer, I have to think about what makes women sexually appealing. Is there a difference between what a female would be attracted to in a beautiful woman? compared to what a man would respond to? I have to believe this to be true. I wish one of our male readers would weigh in on this conversation. Yes as a romance writer I think I have to create a heroine that the female reader would be attracted to. I know it sounds a little off kilter. But we have to be able to identify with the heroine. Feel sexy in HER skin. Relate to her and want to take the journey with her. We have to want her to get her Happily Every After.

And as another level of respect for diversity….what is the connect to attraction and sexuality if you are gay, lesbian or bisexual or even transgendered?

What are the differences in sex appeal? Or is SEXY just plain SEXY regardless of your gender or or sexual expression? It’s one of those questions I wonder about as an author and psychologist. hummm.

The psychology of attraction. What does it for you?

What do you think?

7 responses to “Fantasy Woman Monday

  1. A very interesting question. the thing is, physical attraction is in the eye of the beholder. There’s no doubt, to me, the women in these pics are attractive, as are the men you choose for Fantasy Man Monday 😉 They’re very nice to look at, but sexy isn’t two dimesional, imo. Throw in confidence and a sense of humor, intelligence and compassion. That’s sexy to me, in a man or a woman.

    When writing my f/f, I had to think about this quite a bit. My main character had found women attractive, but never slept with any of them. In the course of stealing some industry info, she may have to sleep with her female boss. The MC is reluctant not because the woman lacks physical beauty, but because she’d rather not go to that extreme with either sex, if possible. But as she gets to know the woman underneath the icy executive, her resolve weakens.

    So yes, I can appreciate a good looking specimen of any gender, but to actually define someone as sexy I would need to see the person behind the pretty.

  2. Good point, Cathy. I’ll confess I’m curious in every respect. Married with kids, but as time goes on, I realize I have closer friendships with my friends. Not that I’m proposition any of them, but it’s made me start to wonder, had I chosen differently…? I guess we all do that around this age. 🙂

    The women in the pictures are gorgeous, but the boxer pic bothers me a little. She looks like she’s about 16. Eek.

    I do think the most important aspect of sex goes on between the ears, not the legs. It takes someone special to overlook outward appearances and be attracted to what’s on the inside. Unfortunately, if one can’t get past the outside, one might not get to the inside, and the inside can be exceptionally special.

    Thanks for sharing, Eden!

    • Ah Cathy and Carla. Interesting discussion. I agree with you Cathy. Sexuality is more than the flesh. You probably both know I am a real Sci Fi reader. What if all attributes of the human body were removed? What if there was a world where the interaction was without denotation of gender or physique? Would love an attraction develop without regard to male or femaleness? And once that veil was removed would the attraction be enduring in spite of social customs, taboo’s and morals? Good discussion.

      Cathy I am intrigued by your F/F piece. It sounds very good. And face it isn’t love LOVE no matter where you write it? I have played with some M/M pieces and some M/F/M menage’ work. Dragon’s Mark was a threesome and it contested very well. Althought, snicker, one judge made the comment. I can’t wait to see which hero she will choose. Well, Duha. I am a big advocate of having your cake and eating it too. lol

      And Carla. I hear a curiosity and question? I would love to see the research numbers on men or women having raised their families reach mid life and wonder humm. Shall I try sample something different than my usual fare? lol

      Is their a silent rising bi-sexual population? And how are they looked upon by the two extremes, gay or straight. Does the straight population look at bi-sexual women and say, smokin baby? Does the Gay community look at the bi-sexuals and say, ‘figure it out — straight or gay?’ I can see some research is in order here.

      Thoughtful reading….happy reading all. Any one care to weigh in with a comment.

  3. By my own ancedotal readings/tv viewings there seems to be a number of straight women who reach their 40’s or so and realize their sexuality is a lot more fluid than they thought. (I don’t know if men go through the same thing, but that would be interesting to know.) I think straight women, overall, are more comfortable seeing other women as sexy than a straight man is willing to see another man. Social taboos, perhaps?

    A world where species don’t rely on gender or physique for attraction would be interesting. A lot of social and biological questions would have to be covered. Get on that, Eden 😉

    As for my book, Eden, it’s penciled in for an August release, and I hope LOTS of people find the relationship intriguing 🙂 But you’re right. Love is love. One of my favorite lines from Jacquiline Carey’s Kushiel series: Love as thou wilt.

    • I like that concept. Give us a plug on your book. Is this the Beacon Winner from 2009? Who’s the Publisher. Where can ppl get it. I think this is a very interesting discussion. I will have to do some research on the matter. I love the quote…..

      LOVE AS THOU WILT. Perfect!

      • The moment I read the Carey quote I was like, “Yes! Exactly!” I hope more and more people understand that concept sooner rather than later.

        The book coming out is the Beacon winner, Bad Girl. Carina Press made an offer in November and I’m waiting for my agent to finish up looking over the contract. (It was quite the exciting week, getting both an offer and an agent 🙂 ) It’ll be out as an ebook some time in August, is all I know right now. I’ll be sure to give more details as they become available.

        I don’t mean to hijack your blog, Eden, but thanks for letting me! 🙂

      • Yes, I had the same thought…like minds… and all. I am so excited for you. I predict that Bad Girl will be a HIT! And you did not hi-jack the blog, it was an invitation. Great to hear your news. Keep us posted on all the details of your release. I am so excited for you.